Sunday, January 7, 2018

Craving Is The Right Word





Do you know what really makes you happy? Do you know what really makes you thrive and come alive? For me, it is satifying the craving of Jack's loving dominance, his leading, and my leaning in. 

Long ago I remember thinking and wondering if this was all there was ............ I had a loving husband, a loving family. We were  doing well. We had handled big things like military deployments. We were good savers and investors. We had plans to see the world, but I was lost wondering if this was all there was. I was not content even though I should be happy. I was doing the leading for sure. I was searching for something more.  I wanted something more and really had no idea what that something more was. I remember thinking just where were the fireworks and the sense of wonder. Where could we recapture that just married-falling-in-love feeling all over again? What could I do? What did we need to do? This always sounded like a privileged sort of problem, but it was, nonetheless, my problem to solve if I wanted happiness. 

I believe strongly that happiness is in the doing, not the having. So what did I have to do to find the fireworks, the spark, the joy that I was searching for? If you have read the blog, you know that we found happiness right here between us with just a little bit of research about ttwd. 

I acknowledged the real and honest need I had to feel my husband's dominance, not in a harsh, mean way, but in his loving leadership guiding us. Jack needed to get comfortable leading and I needed to learn to step back and lean in. 

A little peek into our ttwd life: This morning we showered together. We love doing this and when time is on our side, we enjoy the fun. So I am drying off and telling Jack about something concerning our day. He interrupts saying that it was a little dangerous talking like that standing all bare naked from the shower. I was most spankable. I toned it down and walked right into the closet to get my robe. Jack followed and I said that I was still damp. Jack said that makes no difference to him. Before I put on my robe, Jack spanked reminding me that my words did matter. He pulled me close saying that the day would be perfect now as he had his wife freshly spanked. There was peace in his world. I smiled as I rubbed my backside and we went on with our day. 


So from the glimpse, you need to know that I crave that. I thrive on times like that little bathroom/closet exchange. It makes me happy, grounded and at peace. I feel his dominance and his arms around me. I have found those fireworks and they were right between us all this time. Jack agrees with all of this and enjoys the way it works so well. 

When we are adrift or fighting colds or traveling, the craving is right there, but our attention is focused on other things. We work it out and are right back to one another. Jack fell in love with spanking because he saw right away what happened. My attitude and the color of my bottom both changed and Jack took notice. I feel great contentment and intimacy in what we have made together. 

Do you crave your husband's dominance? Do his dominance and your leaning in make the fireworks in your world like they make the fireworks in ours?

Meredith 

32 comments:

  1. M,
    We are most happy when he is leading and I'm following. When the balance of power shifts even slightly those little reminders, as you just described, take us right back where we need to be. It's a beautiful and loving relationship, what you've depicted in your post.
    --Baker

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    1. Baker,
      Thank you for your kind, supportive words.
      M

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  2. To answer your question...YES. I think the word crave is extremely accurate. I crave the dominance, and I thrive on it in a very similar way that you have described here. The fireworks are here, and here to stay. It works very well for both of us and we feel blessed to have found this little ‘secret’. xo.

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    1. Laurel,
      We do love those fireworks after all these years. Thank you for your comments.
      M

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  3. You know what, Meredith, I could have written this. It absolutely sounds exactly like the relationship I have with Eric. Now we are starting to realize, the more I lean in and the more we move forward, the more he craves it as well. We are so lucky to have found each other first, and to have discovered ttwd as early on in our marriage as we have.
    Amy

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    1. Amy,
      You are right............ it is a wonderful thing!
      Thanks, Amy
      M

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  4. Very well said, Mere...I very much understand that craving. So happy you and Jack are doing well.

    Hugs and blessings...Cat

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    1. Cat,
      I am glad you understand this craving.
      Thank you,
      M

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  5. I love this Meredith, very well said :)

    Hugs
    Roz

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  6. Lovely Meredith and I totally agree with the craving. You and Jack have a wonderful relationship.
    Hugs Lindy xx

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  7. Hi Merry, what a nice post :)Glad you are so happy.
    love Jan, xx

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  8. This is not only accurate but heartfelt, Mere. There are times when things don't seem just right, and I crave the balance that spanking brings. Sam must feel it, too, and has learned what we need to bring it back to center. Like a living, breathing Yin and Yang.

    That's when you feel the fireworks and the intense love between the two of you. How lucky we are. Thanks for a lovely post.

    Ella

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    1. Ella,
      Here is an old saying for you............. you and I were cut from the same cloth......... we both crave ttwd.
      M

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  9. Good post Mere. I like the peaks much better than the valleys.

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    1. Sunny,
      Hope you are feeling better. I love the peaks.
      M

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  10. I always learn something new about how I feel when I read your posts, Meredith. As you know, we are a slow moving couple when it comes to TTWD - lol! It's hard for me to express myself properly, so that my husband understands my craving for his leadership. I think he confuses it with the idea that he has to be "mean" and he doesn't have a mean bone in his body. Thankfully.
    I am also a fairly even keeled person - on the outside anyway. My emotions do not generally get the best of me so it's probably harder for him to understand what I'm asking. Then I read this loving post and it reminds me that I need to express this part of TTWD to him more clearly. The concept of how it brings couples closer together. So once again, thank you for sharing your heart.

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    1. Deena,
      You are one of the main reasons I keep writing. I am glad my post helps and thank you for your words of praise.
      M

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    2. I am in the same situation. Need to be more clear and step back an he steps forward.

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    3. Annony,
      The most important thing we have is our communication.
      Than you for commenting.
      M

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  11. My marriage wasn’t broke, didn’t need fixing, but there was one thing missing. When Harry finally agreed to spank me after 43 years it made me happy. It wasn’t until the first ‘real’ spanking that I realised my need was to know that my man was stronger than I am and being spanked was the outward manifestation of that. I hadn’t really noticed until then that Harry had become more assertive and I was getting my way less often. We have come a long way since then and, yes, I crave his loving leadership. Though there are other tools in the ttwd box, there’s nothing like a good spanking to keep me on an even keel! We are closer and happier than we’ve ever been.
    Great post as ever, Mere.
    Rosie xx

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    1. Rosie,
      We both feel and recognize the very same thing........ craving his loving leadership and assertive leading. There is nothing like a good spanking and some good MFL.
      Thank you,
      M

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  12. OMG, you have described it perfectly. Our marriage before DD and today, even the little bathroom/closet spankings. I crave his dominance. And our marriage has the fireworks. So glad that we found this lifestyle. And I am so happy for you too.

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    1. Blondie,
      You and me both on finding this lifestyle.
      M

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  13. Crave is the perfect word. When we get wrapped up in other things, I feel like something's missing and my moods go up and down. Then I realize that's what I'm missing and once it's back, I'm on cloud 9!

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    1. Madeline,
      I will meet you on Cloud 9. See you there!
      M

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  14. Hi Meredith, :) Loved your post! There is nothing better than getting back into the swing of things (HA!), following a period of time when life gets in the way of the smooth running of our dynamic! The words “longing for” come to mind, during these times. Although many parts of the dynamic remain, there is nothing better than his hand on my bottom, rubbing after a spanky connection! Dang, it’s hot Hot HOT!!! Many hugs,

    ❤️Katie

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  15. loved this post...so thoughtful Thanks for sharing Hugs

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