Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Lindy And Deena Are Up Next





I just love this photo. I had braids when I was about the age of this young lady. However, our ttwd is far from what this photo presents. This little girl looks like she is in big trouble. 

First things first, when we began ttwd, we did so with a good understanding of some basics. We are both adults and as adults, we enter into ttwd as partners. Yes, one partner is leading and one partner is following, but we both have a voice. We decided NEVER to use the word punishment ever. Period! 

Lindy and Deena, like all ttwd couples, sometimes we are away from home when things get bumpy. Jack will not usually spank in hotels. Spankings are loud even at best. So when we return from our times away, Jack will very often do an RA spanking. The purpose of this spanking is to get us both back on track and to reinforce our ttwd ways.

When we are away, we do a lot of talking when those bumps happen........... Jack does the talking and I do the listening. He firmly and quietly reminds me of our ttwd promise to one another. We talk things over, with both of us doing the talking. We use words until we are home. Once we are home, there are many things to do. Laundry, mail, groceries, life and once we get all things back in order, Jack will address things that happened while we were away. 

This time, we talked with me over the bed. The spanking was mild, even loving. However, when we finished and he brought me into his arms, we were both reconnected and there was peace. What we do is very adult, loving and yes, it works every single time. 

Lindy and Deena, remember that word punishment is never for us. Remember that a spanking promised while away often is tame once home. Because we have been at this almost four years, we know how to communicate better, listen better and do ABK when things go awry. I find that using ABK (always be kind, thank you, Katie) is the best tool when you are away from your usual.

Meredith

8 comments:

  1. I find that being away from home is sometimes tricky for our ttwd. I like the way that Jack handles things, getting you both back on track by talking when away, and then getting you both back on track when at home with a little something else. Those ttwd words can be mighty powerful and we already know that Jack does the talk very, very well!
    Great answer Meredith!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is very helpful. Sometimes our issue is not that we aren't home, but there is no convenient time and it just feels weird for a problem to be ignored but it's just as weird to address a problem that is no longer a problem. I love love love the concept of an RA. That makes so much sense. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Love the way you answered these questions, Mere. So nice getting to see your dynamics. Thanks for sharing.

    Hugs and blessings...Cat

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Meredith, I love how you work through issues that arise while away. RA to clear the air, reinforce your dynamic and reconnect sounds perfect. As Deena said, once a problem is no longer a problem...

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you Meredith for your answer. Enjoyed reading the wonderful way Jack and you handle this situation.

    Hugs Lindy xx

    ReplyDelete
  6. Coming home is such a comforting thing. That feeling of crawling into your very own bed. Of having your familiar things around you. Of the view from the kitchen window while sipping coffee. And these days, the reconnection that comes from a spanking like that makes you reaffirm, "There is no place like home."

    Ella

    ReplyDelete
  7. Love this post, Mere. Good communication is the heart of ttwd. We don't use "punishment" either. "Discipline", yes. You've taught us much. Happy Easter.
    SSB

    ReplyDelete
  8. Meredith, I can relate to the way you and Jack deal with this. Punishment isn't a word in the Harry and Rosie ttwd lexicon either. Whether or not there have been issues, we also employ the 'welcome home' reconnection to get back to our version of normal after a holiday. Thanks for sharing.
    Rosie xx

    ReplyDelete