Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Snuffing Out The Little WildFires

I have had this post on my mind for a while now, but no photo. Although L. scopes out most of the photos on this blog, I felt this is one photo I had to find myself. Wildfires.......... like in this very photo here can turn into a big blazing mess. Right? 

Smoldering................ wildfires can ignite into a huge bonfire...... right

Then we really have a problem. It is time to call in the help of a childhood folklore figure..........

We have been in a wildfire patch here. Little skirmishes can lead to big bonfires. I kept remembering good ole' Smokey the Bear saying "Only You ............". I had the distinct feeling that Smokey was talking to me when he pointed that finger right at me. I did not want a bonfire, out of control igniting from smothering small fires. 

So enough with photos and this small fire analogy. We have had a series of small, but real differences of opinion and points of view. I had not been listening carefully. I had flitted from one thing to another, not paying attention to Jack. Things were getting dicey and my guy was not happy. 

Then I just stopped. I knew exactly how all this bickering would end. I decided to ask for a meeting in his arms and at our sitting spot. We communicated for quite awhile. I listened and soaked in what he wanted. I did not interrupt. I remained calm as we sat close. Jack listened to me. I looked my husband in the eye. I remained respectful. We settled a few things and no one was spanked. Then the talking was over and so were all those pesky small wildfires. 

So much of ttwd is about communication....... talking and listening going hand in hand. Many couples have forgotten how to do just that. Give it a try. It works. Plus then you have a happy husband.

Ella wrote a comment on my last post that maybe you might have missed. She wrote that ttwd now becomes ttwa......... that thing we are! I do like that a lot. Thanks, Ella! 


Saturday, March 25, 2017

Katie And Meredith Have Been Talking

Well, in fact, Katie and I talk all the time. Our different time zones drive us nuts, but we usually talk while I am walking my five mile course. This morning was no exception. One of the topics this morning was all of you, our readers. 

Traditionally here in blogland, the month of March is set aside as our question and answer month. Readers ask the questions and bloggers do the answering. So the two of us are reviving this tradition and invite other bloggers to join us.

So here on my blog, it is your turn to ask those burning questions. I will collect them for a future post. If you prefer, you can email your question for privacy. My email is right here on the blog in the upper right-hand corner. 

Let's get started. 
Are you ready? Do you have a question?


Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Ttwd Is Not What We Do, But Who We Are

I often think about this life I lead, this ttwd life. This man of mine really likes how this works for us. He says daily that he likes me "freshly spanked".  He says he loves and enjoys the results. He has a calmer wife. I think Jack was surprised the first couple of times he spanked me. I know I was. We both found this reigniting of passion amazing, not gone or dormant. It seemed like what we had as two young marrieds. Finding we could capture and enjoy this passion all over again was wonderful. Imagine finding something that makes it all new and fun again........ that is what we have and we treasure it. 

When we decided to take this path, it was a new and exciting time. After close to four years, it is simply who we are now. We live it, but do not talk about it as we once did. I have learned so much about many things.  And I have learned a great deal from you. 
Thank you!

When I was first blogging, I had a dear friend. She was a fellow blogger and she told me that ttwd was now an integral part of who they were. She decided to take her blog down. I asked her if she was going to still read the blogs and in particular, mine. She told me no. We parted ways and I miss her. If she were to read this, perhaps she might decide to write to me. We shall see.

I received an email from a long time reader. She lives far away from us and the chance of meeting one another is slim, although still possible. She has kids at home and in college and is a busy wife and mother. I just love her. Our lives have now crossed over to the real side and we enjoy one another on FaceBook. We love supporting one another and becoming one another's biggest fans.

This reader wrote an eloquent paragraph about her marriage and ttwd. I asked her if I could share it with all of you, and she graciously said yes. Here is what she wrote:

It is a strange thing- the way our men become so attractive when they are letting us know we are about to be spanked, huh? Sometimes I simultaneously feel annoyed and rebellious (just to be honest!) -- but, even then, there is a level of feeling attached to him that can't be denied. As I 've told my husband several times, as much as I do not want to be spanked, I also long for the reconciliation and peace that comes. Sometimes I feel a physical longing for it........ which, the first few times, made me feel almost convinced I was crazy! LOL!  I would know it was coming and we would have to wait, (as we do most times), until there are time and space for it, and I longed so much for the outcome that my body would actually long to be over his knee, getting things done. The thing is, there has never been a time it didn't bring us completely back together, completely resolving the issue. It happens every single time. 

I find these last two sentences so true. What about you? 

Ttwd is not what we do. It is who we are. What about you?

Then my sweet friend Laurel wrote to me. Actually, we are always writing, but this email fit right into the essence of this post. She generously said yes to my sharing what she wrote.

 I absolutely agree with this statement. Ttwd is not what we do; it is who we are. It has become so natural that we don't have to think about the workings of our marriage anymore; that is just how it is........ how we live, eat, breathe, play and love. Ttwd is all encompassing. It's so much who we are that it is a deep, inherent element in our life. We believe in it, we grow with it, we trust it. It takes care of the most precious of things....... us. It is just who we are now. First by choice (and always by choice), but now simply because after living this way, we see there is no alternative or going back. I think we are always aware of ttwd and always are striving to make things better holding dear to the good things it brings.......... better communication, affection, respect, consideration, caring, loving and peace. By no means though is it easy. It requires commitment, work and a lot of listening for it to keep afloat. You have to want it and need it deeply. When I talk about roles, I don't feel that word is accurate because we are not playing roles here, but living our lives honestly, but when writing, it makes it easier to use that word. It is hard to put into words the peace and love felt living this way. I feel it in our marriage daily and with all my heart. 

There is nothing sexier that a husband spanking his wife. 

Thank you, Jennifer and Laurel. You both wrote inspirationally. 

In the end, this ttwd becomes a part of who we are as a couple. It is simply just who we are! 

How about you?


Sunday, March 19, 2017

Sticking To The Plan

There have been times since beginning ttwd that I have had trouble sticking to the plan. Today a faithful reader wrote to me regarding sticking to the plan. So now I will explain. 

Before I begin this reader's story, I thought I would share a diagram of how men and women approach plans. I showed this to Jack and he absolutely agreed. Men are hunters........ get in and get out. Women are gatherers meandering through so as not to miss anything. Do you agree? 

First what happens here............ life can get complicated. There are lots of things to do and a plan works. With Jack, we always follow a plan...... first, we go here, then we go there and so on. We do have times when we are more spontaneous. When I shop with a friend, we enjoy the fact that there is no plan! We meander and wander enjoying conversation and time together. So sometimes there is a plan and sometimes we alter the plan as needed into no plan at all. 

Not long ago, I received an email from a long-time faithful reader. She found herself in a situation and wanted my advice. Here it was Valentine's Day and her husband had decided that they would be staying home due to a family situation. They would celebrate with ice cream at a local ice cream place and look forward to another time for a dinner out. Then the situation changed and my friend texted her husband that they could indeed go out for a Valentine dinner. At this very point, the story became interesting. Her husband texted that plans were in place and they would be staying home. and would go for ice cream after dinner. Many texts crisscrossed between the couple. He held firm and said that there was no reason to change the plans and a decision had been made. 

My dear reader wrote that a dinner out would be wonderful, but her husband was firm about staying home. She asked me for advice. What should she do.......accept his decision or badger him into changing his mind? I said I knew exactly what and why she wanted here. However, a ttwd wife must follow those decisions that do not always make life easy. Ugh? I encouraged her to lean in here. She did just that only to have her husband text that he now wanted to go out to dinner. When they arrived at the chosen restaurant, they were turned away because they had no reservations. Where did they end up? That's right........ the ice cream place....... the very place they intended to go earlier when they were having dinner at home!

My friend did lean in and I think she felt pleased that she had supported her husband even though it was not what she had wanted. To end up at the very same ice cream place is poetic. She says that they are making their way and things are always changing. She always has such a confident outlook and I really like her. She has a keen sense of humor that I enjoy. I know she would value your comments. 


Saturday, March 18, 2017

Breaking My Own Rule....... Second Try

Have you ever wanted to reach into your computer and ring somebody's neck? Blogger did me in yesterday. Poof, my post already posted went who knows where! Over two days, I spent about four hours writing a long meme, Abby's this time. Ella had forgiven my resistance to memes and I was all set. So today I am starting over. Here goes attempt #2.

When I began blogging, I did a few memes and realized how much information, real information, I revealed about the real me. I shied away from all memes. Sweet Ella even asked me to co-author a meme and I declined. So now there are two memes floating around blogland and I am tempted. Ella says she forgives my resistance, but there is a price to pay. We will one day write a joint meme!

Thank you, Abby. This one is yours! 

Before I begin, I had just complained to Jack that few bloggers were posting including yours truly. He made a swift comment in reply: "No blog postings means all the Hohs are doing their jobs. And all the ttwd wives are doing theirs."  I did a little sass back and received some sweet, but firm attention to my backside as we went on to enjoy one another. 

So here is my deal. I will answer all the questions in Abby's meme and, readers, you choose one or two questions to answer back in the comment section. How does that sound? 

As an aside, all comments are now reviewed before posting as many of bloggers have been hacked with unwanted comments. So  I will review your comments before posting them.

Abby's Meme

Who is the oldest? 

That would be me by a little ole' year. It drives me nuts. 

Who was interested first?

Jack kissed me on his front porch and bingo, we were both very interested at the very same time. We fell in love together s mighty long tome ago. We were one another's first love. We were 17 with my birthday right around the corner. 

Same high school?

This is where our story gets dicey, too dicey to share. We met under funny circumstances. Our story has been told and retold and I simply cannot share it here. We are attending the same high school, and Jack was dating a senior and I was dating a very good looking younger guy. When he asked me out, I asked a friend if I should go as he was a year younger. She quickly said that he was asking me out, not asking me to get married. Words come back to haunt you sometimes.

Worst temper?

We are both guilty occasionally. I can flip out and rant, but seldom get far anymore now that we are a ttwd couple. My guy simply puts an end to it....... on my end!

Who is more sensitive? 

That would be me again. Although Jack is very sensitive as well. Recently during the slide/music presentation at a dear friend's memorial service, he cried. I can cry reading a book, watching a movie, talking with a friend, or listening to my husband talk quietly and deeply after a spanking. 

More social?

In our early years, I was much more social. Now it is Jack who keeps our social calendar full and interesting. Sometimes I love it and sometimes I just want to be alone with my husband. 

Wakes up first? 

That would be me again. I make the coffee and he prepares the frothy mixture and serves me a hot cup once brewed. Sweet!!

Bigger family?

Jack has two brothers and no sisters. 
I have two sisters and no brothers. 

Who cooks the most? 

Have you read Julia Childs' biography? She was a wonderful, interesting chef and by her side doing the whisking, cutting and such was Maria. I am Jack's Maria, his sous-chef. 

In our early years, I was the cook, but we always worked together. 

I am the pastry chef. I bake blue ribbon peach and apple pies and apple roses using puff pastry. 

We work together for all our dinner parties. We plan, shop, prepare, cook, serve and clean up as a team. All good until I break one of his  expensive martini glasses! 

He grills and I love it.


Flowers have played a big part in our marriage. We were a military family sometimes separated by deployments both stateside and out of country. When Jack received a promotion in rank, he always sent me a huge bouquet wrapped in cellophane always surprising me at my work place. 

Jack is our gardener. He loves doing all of it and I reap the benefits. He made a cutting garden for me complete with tea roses, peonies, dahlias, sweet peas on a trellis and tulips. 

Cries more?

I do cry more, but not often. I do get teary eyed when Jack is taking care of things involving my bottom, but only after I am in his arms. 

Better singer?

That would be me again. I can sing all the songs from the Sound of Music. No one wants to hear Jack sing. Trust me!

Best driver?

Jack wins this one. He does the driving on our road trips and he wants me to be his agreeable helpmate passenger. I supply the jelly beans and green grapes. He does not want me giving instructions, directions or advice. He has his way to make sure I follow his wishes. 

Hogs the remote?

We often watch TV together cuddled up and the remote is not any concern at all. 

Clothes'shoe hoarder? 

This one is tricky as I do love my clothes and shoes. Jack says I hang on to clothes for sentimental reasons and he is right. I love touching my dress up clothes hanging in the closet on padded hangers. I know he is right about my being too emotional about those clothes. 

More stubborn? 

That would be me again. In the years before ttwd, I could dig my heels in and not budge in my opinion. That does not work for me now. Digging heels and ttwd do not go together. 

Who said I love you first?

Now this is funny! I just asked Jack that question. For the life of me or us for that matter, we simply cannot remember who said it first. Falling in love was immediate and fast and never ending. 

There you have it. A meme is fun as long as not too many secrets are revealed. 

Now it is your turn to choose one or two or more questions. Share your answers and thank you for participating. 

Thanks, L.

Thursday, March 2, 2017


Things are great here at Jack and Meredith's house. I often find myself reflecting on how much we have changed. Things are smooth.  I do a lot more listening and a lot less fuming when things aren't always my way. I have learned and practice leaning in and Jack has continued to treat me like his queen, a sore bottomed queen every once in awhile, but nonetheless, a queen. 

What we find amazing is our intimacy as if we are newlyweds. Jack  has said on several occasions that there is nothing more sexy than spanking his wife. He achieves his peace in his valley and then has his way with me. I feel so loved. We continue to make our way. The good days far out number the rough ones and we love the good ones. The rough ones do teach us to be more respectful. Jack knows how to change my mood in a heartbeat. I love to make him smile remembering to do the small things he has requested of me. 

After almost four years of ttwd, I would change nothing and only look forward to what is coming. Jack likes me feisty and knows how to handle the things that come his way. We laugh a lot and many a spanking is surrounded with laughter and always with love.  Jack loves me freshly spanked. And so do I. It is the communication and the intimacy that are valued most. 

What are the things you value most from ttwd?

Thanks, L