Monday, October 3, 2016

Facebook And Our Ttwd Marriage

Shhhhh.....blogland must be sleeping............ so quiet, I feel like tiptoeing around so I disturb no one. I am even a little nervous about blogging when no one else is here. PK and Sunny are here offering stories and books to enjoy. Of course, there is sweet Cat who keeps us all laughing, but so many are gone. We are off to visit Katie and Rob this week so I thought I would do a post, but what was I going to write about? Things are smooth in the Malloy home so writing about spankings was out. I wanted to do a post, but sometimes feel that I have written all there is to write about ttwd, Jack and Meredith. 

We were enjoying frothy coffee in bed, the shutters open to the golden autumn sunlight. Laptops were bringing in the news and emails. We share many things while we do this. We turn away from the morning TV shows and the blaring radio. We talk, drink our coffee and begin our day. So I went to Facebook and began scrolling. I came to an article which was interesting so I shared. I told Jack that the gist of the article was addressing bossy women. When women are bossy, recognize that they are really demonstrating leadership skills. Just think of that.  So my Jack turns to me, and with a sincere smile says that he would lead me right to the edge of the bed if bossiness was demonstrated and he would be showing the leadership right there as I was over the bed. I smiled big and drank my coffee knowing I was in the safest of all places. 

Funny, that this bossiness was the Facebook topic we were had been addressing here at home. We have had issues with my bossiness several times in the past few days. We had talked about it several times and then the Facebook article links bossiness to leadership. Old habits slip back into place occasionally. I am guilty sometimes. Now I know for sure that bossiness is not leadership in Jack's eyes and he will address it in a most ttwd way.......... over the bed! 

We had had a few days of edgy attitude. Prickly exchanges occurred between us and I thought I had settled down only to have another prickly exchange occur. I thought a spanking was sure to happen. Things would calm down, only to have things get dicey again. Finally, I took a gamble and asked Jack about his score card and if he were going to spank. 

He is the perfect ttwd hoh. He does not like to talk about ttwd. Rather he lives it. Leader and lover, the man who is my husband asks me to lean in and follow. He asks me to remember my role as he remembers and acts on his. He doesn't talk about it, rather it is who we are. He acts on it and expects me to act on my role as well. 

So when I asked him if he were going to spank, he stopped preparing dinner and pulled me close. He began talking big time. He told me he does not like to talk about spanking as he spanks when he needs to. The score card is his and it is his alone. It is not ours, but his. We talk about the way our roles are solid. We discuss the decisions we make always together. We are a team and a long-married team at that. He told me as always, our love is so very strong. 

My advice to you, my readers is to not believe everything you read on Facebook. Right? Bossiness evolves into leadership...... don't bet on it. Not at our house!

Thaks, Leah



  1. Had the biggest grin on my face as I read this, Mere...can just picture this conversation. You two are so cute. Have a wonderful visit with Katie and Rob...please give Katie a big hug from me...and have her give you one from me. Oh and the two of you...don't do anything I wouldn't you a lot of leeway. ;)

    Hugs and blessings...Cat

  2. I think I can see that in my husband too. He doesn't talk about spankings, but he sure does act on them.

    It is also an interesting point about bossiness evolving into leadership. I've never seen bossiness helping to create a positive perception of anyone's leadership skills, whether that leader is male or female. Teamwork, communication, trust and respect work best both within ttwd and outside of it.

    Have fun with Rob and Katie.


  3. It's a wonderful feeling to feel safe and loved, knowing that all will be taken care of if and when the time comes. It's a pretty great life we live and you sharing yours here just proves it.
    Have a wonderful time away. XO

  4. Have a fun visit with Katie and Rob.
    Hugs Lindy

  5. Enjoy your time with Katie and Rob. What a wonderful opportunity to build on good relationships. Sir does not like to discuss spankings, why or why not he chooses to do so. This remains solely up to him which can be frustrating to me at times. I do what I can to lean in whichever way he decides. I can say bossiness in our home from me pretty much guarantees a trip over Sir's lap and not in a pleasant way for sure. It's been one of my weakest areas and one Sir is working on this year. As always, enjoy reading your posts.

  6. Hi Meredith, this made me smile too :) Jack sure is on top of things, and how wonderful to feel safe and loved :)

    Have a wonderful time with Rob and Katie.


  7. Hi Meredith,

    Have a wonderful time with Katie and Rob and please give Katie a big hug for me.


  8. Mere,,,have a great trip,,sounds like fun.


  9. Have a great time with Katie and Rob.

  10. You always have such insightful posts that once again clarify things for me. It feels like we are still floundering around trying to figure things out. Thank you. Again. Enjoy your visit! You and Katie are lucky to have one another!

  11. Have fun and try to stay out of trouble!

  12. Sweet post! Have fun with Katie & Rob! :)

  13. Meredith, thank you for all your kind words and caring messages. I think I finally "Got the Message."

    Bossiness has been rampant here. With not feeling well for so long, Sam has given me a lot of leeway. Somedays I needed that, but the bossiness never turns out right.

    It is certainly not leadership. It seems to grow like a nasty weed until all the lovely flowers have been crowded out. And I don't like myself when I hear bossy words come out of my mouth.

    Will try to remember the wise advice you always have to share.

    Just Ella

  14. Thanks for sharing this wonderful and insightful time. It's a good reminder

  15. Meredith,
    I nearly got onto my soap box reading this. It really gets my goat that women in authority are reviled as "bossy" but men in the same positions are "assertive" and admired. I know you wrote this in the context of ttwd though, so I reined myself in!

    We choose to be followers in our relationships, leaning in to our husbands, and bossiness leads to trouble of the spanking kind. It's far from easy sometimes though, especially if we've been in powerful positions in our working lives.

    I do believe "bossiness" can be a sign of leadership, I am a born bossy boots and have managed other people most of my working life. There is only one boss in my house, though, and it isn't me!

    Sorry, the soap box came out after all. Thought provoking post!

    Have a great time with Katie and Rob, I guess you're a way through your visit now, I'm doing some catching up.

    Rosie xx