Sunday, October 26, 2014

What Happened When Meredith Really Messed Up Big Time

The weather looked bleak and thunder with lightning bolts threatened. Althought the sun was shining, in my world, we were heading into a storm. Your friend Meredith was in a real pickle and she had only herself to blame. I did things a different way and the results were tough. I spent a full day in sheer agony mentally thinking that real agony might be mine at the other end of the day.

I went to lunch with my sister and she offered to pick me up. I left via the front door and was down the steps and on my way. We had a great time as sisters do. She brought me home and I went up the steps, put the key in the lock, opened the door and waved her good-bye. Later Jack and I went out to dinner and the next day we went on a fall hike in the lovely autumn weather. Friday morning Jack left for golf and knew I could not find my keys anywhere. If I was to go walking, I needed by car and keys as I was meeting a friend. I began with a search of pockets of the pants and jacket I was wearing. No keys! Now, between couch cushions and under everything! No keys.......... I was beginning to sweat! Where were they? I thought about where I was the last time I used them and slowly walked to the front door. I took a deep breath and opened the door. The keys were cold to the touch and dangled in the lock. Forty-eight hours had passed since I left for lunch with my sister. I held the cold keys in my hand and wondered if we would be entering the world of Dd for the first time in a long, long time.

I did text Jack telling him I have found my keys and then told him where the key had been. There was a real long pause in the time from receiving my test to sending his own: we would be discussing this later. I immediately prayed for a low golf score and plenty of sunshine on the fairways.

So I began a full day of worry and angst. What would Jack do? I stewed and wrote to a few friends and then I prayed. I felt horrible about what I did. I had altered the way I entered our home and really, never looked back. Those keys in the front door lock mocked our security of our home and our lives. We live in a safe neighborhood, but like any neighborhood, things can happen and strangers lurk. By the time Jack arrived home, I was a mess. When he reached me, I had been crying and now the tears really came. He took me in his arms and told me that he did not spank for things like that. Yes, it was a careless thing to do, but it was truly an accident. He calmed me down and did say that a reminder spanking would help clean the slate and let the guilt I was feeling go.

We were out with friends that evening and he said he would spank in the morning. Once home, under the covers, he held me and said the morning would be the best time to take care of things. I tossed and turned until Jack said that if I did not settle down, he would take care of things right then. He did spank, but it was easy and affirming of our ttwd. He was most benevolent and loving knowing my intentions were not to be dangerous or careless. He is an Hoh who takes many things into consideration: my distress, my heartfelt apology and how things would go on from there. His decision was to talk to me and to love me.

I love him and I love him for his decision in this mess of mine. I felt his love, strength and leadership. He knew I felt rotten and guilty.  Perhaps other young couples will see what happens when two long time married people approach a dicey situation. Spanking is not always the answer.

What would be the answer at you house?

And if he gives you immediate forgiveness, you are a very lucky wife!

Thanks, L.



  1. In my world, a clean slate is always in forgiveness not in punishment

  2. Hi Meredith, the results in our house would have been exactly the same as in yours ! Sometimes forgiveness is needed more than punishment and our wise men know just that
    love Jan,xx

  3. There is such a difference between those real accidents and unthoughtful, hurtful, purposeful acts. When growing up my mum would never get cross if we broke something around the house if it was accidental, had we been playing tennis indoors she would have been livid!
    You and Jack seem to be in a very calm and loving place.

  4. Mere,
    So sorry for the angst that you went through but so so happy for how it all ended. Jack is the perfect combo of gentle firmness, wisdom and forgiveness. Lucky you!
    (I think I'm blessed with a forgiving hubby too) :)

  5. Mere,,,Jack is such a sweetie,,: )


  6. Glad you found your keys that can be scarey.

  7. As I've often told people, spanking is just one small tool of DD. We don't usually intend to be careless...if this had been a bad habit instead of a one time thing, that would have been a different story. Good job Jack.

    Hugs and Blessings...

  8. Well, you already know what my thoughts are on this. Sometimes lots of hugs and loving reinforcement are needed much more than a spanking. This was a complete mistake - we are all human, although some would like to think they aren't. Cat sums it up nicely - spanking is just a very small part of TTWD. Your communication with Jack said it all.


  9. Sweet Story, Meredith. You two are so much fun to read about.

  10. I would imagine that your worries over the keys hanging there for so long and also over how Jack would respond will make you more aware the next time you use the front door. His hugs and understanding were just perfect once he saw that you sincerely regretted what had happened. No name calling, blame or spanking necessary. Yes, you are a lucky wife. I bet you treat him lovingly and respectfully too!

  11. Sorry Mere, I've been sick.
    I've done something like that before, and I know that sinking feeling in your stomach. I think Jack handled this situation wonderfully, he's a great HOH. and yes, there is a big difference between forgetting something and willfully disobeying IMO, and they are dealt with differently in our marriage too.

    Hugs <3

  12. Though I don't practice DD this is what I envision :-)

  13. Hi Meredith, I'm sorry I am so late in commenting. I'm sorry you went through all that angst and worry but love how Jack handled this. He took all circumstances into account, the fact it was an honest mistake and gave you what you needed :)


  14. I missed this post somehow. I've done that in the past too. It's an awful feeling when you feel like you've jeopardized your security!!
    I think at this point in our ttwd, I would've gotten a spanking for it. Thankfully, my FM is very understanding. He knows how my brain works and I forget absolutely everything!

  15. Isn't grace and undertanding the most beautiful thing coming from the man who loves us most. So glad you found your keys. There is nothing that frustrates me more than when I can't find something. Loved your post.

  16. Yup, we call this grace in my part of the world. And it's awesome. There have been times that The Man has been more understanding than I would have been, and it humbles me..

  17. Ugh! I know the feeling of literally searching everywhere for your keys (little hands were the culprits in my case, lol). Super glad Jack understood and only gave you a reminder spanking, rather than a full punishment.