Friday, August 8, 2014

Situational DD

The truth is........ we do dd sometimes............... It happens!  We call it situational dd. Behind the blog, I write to my friends and bemoan when this happens. One of those dear friends coined a term for it. She and her hubby refer to it as situational dd. Situational dd happens seldom here, but it does happen. Since we began ttwd/dd over a year ago, Jack has commented on how calm I am. He appreciates how I speak respectfully. I am not disagreeable. He likes the way I listen to him. Life here is easy and we have learned how to deal with the bumps......... situational dd.

Jack keeps the peace and things are usually very smooth around here. I enjoy and take pleasure in pleasing him. He keeps me happy and satisfied in many ways. However, sometimes we have bumpy patches and Jack is quick to set things right. We call those times our situational dd episodes. I shy away from sharing those times as I want privacy here on a ttwd/dd blog. Sounds funny, right?

Coming home real grumpy from errands and talking back in a rude way, ...............  spanked, situational dd

No gossip rule is in place and Jack has used his hand to reinforce the rule..... spanked, situational dd

Curing my bad habit of interrupting............ spanked, situational dd

Distancing when we are discussing something and things escalated............ spanked,  situational dd

Pulling back from working as a team with Jack because I am upset........ distancing and frustrating my husband ............ spanked, situational dd

You get the idea. It doesn't happen often. For the most part, we enjoy good girl spankings, role affirmation and all that goes with those loving times including Jack's loving boot camp. Even a smooth time can be occasionally interrupted by the need for situational dd. Jack, my peace keeper, loves his motto: Lean in or lean over. As seldom as situational dd happens, we both know it is right there.



  1. I love the term situational DD! I think that's how I would describe our dynamic too...just not lately LOL. Even if it's just situational, it's nice to know he's there to catch you and support you. Sweet post Mere!


  2. I love his motto "lean in or lean over" :-) Sounds like perfect support... Hugs

  3. I love that motto too! I sure wish Nick would adopt it. Sounds to me like you're doing things just right. I'm happy for you.

  4. I love that 'lean in or lean over" too. Lucky girl

  5. Hi Meredith, new follower/reader here. Just wanted to say that I am really enjoying your blog so far, and echo the above comments on the motto of lean in or lean over. How perfect!


  6. Hi Meredith, Love the "lean in or lean over" too. We have occasional "reining in" situations here!
    love Jan,xx

  7. Lean in or lean over is my newest favorite saying ever! Love your blog Meredith!

  8. I've also heard it referred to as DD lite. :) I think that's how we are, too, but we started as strictly using disciplinary spankings. Now that we have incorporated the nondisciplinary ones, my behavior is much easier to manage and the disciplinary ones are fewer.

    I finally started my own blog @

  9. Oops, I mean

  10. Love that term! I think this will be us years down the road when we are not dealing with all the stresses of raising a family & both working full time least that is what I envision!
    Great post ; )

  11. I find labels can be confusing and really only make sense to the couple using it. Sometimes they're helpful, ex. DD lite, so others have some understanding of where you're coming from.

    Don't you find that 99% of dd is "situational dd", i.e. discipline is administered when the situation calls for it?

    Glad you and Jack are enjoying each other so much.

  12. Ah Mere,
    You and Jack are my favorite couple. All that you learn - all that you share - it's so wonderful and encouraging to me.

    I totally understand what you are saying with your situational dd - since now usually you are ttwd. But on the rare occasion that there is a slip - a situation - and Jack thinks it's appropriate, it's dd - and then right back to ttwd. Sounds perfect. :)


  13. Loved this. A perfect description of what can happen in specific instances. Things occur, action is taken, you both keep moving along in
    Harmony. It's almost like a graceful dance and you two have mastered the steps and are in sync. Your a beautiful couple and set a great example for all if us to learn from. As always, your gracious enough to share your wisdom.

  14. hmmm. i know i don't comment much, and i certainly don't post much, but... we DO live a dd lifestyle and have for a very long time. i have a couple questions... one, if you're in a dd relationship, isn't it always situational? two, when you say you mainly talk behind the blog, why is that? and why do you continue to say it? i've read multiple blog posts and you always make a comment about it, and so i'm always curious why you have a blog at all if you always live behind the blog? just asking.

    but this is my big question, meredith...

    when the whole christina thing went down, why did you email me, wanting to know all the inside information? and i wouldn't give you any information because it felt very wrong to talk about the situation. i told you that i didn't feel right about it. why did you do that? why did you email me? and isn't that basically gossiping? i felt weird in the position as i do not gossip and never have. if i have something to say to someone, i just say it... but even that is rare because i have never considered myself to be a pot-stirrer (unless you count the rare comment i might leave when my dander is up, ie: like now).

    that email was what made me afraid to invite you to read my blog. you have written me twice, asking to be able to read my blog and i worry that you will take the what i write and talk about me behind my back--which i don't really mind actually, but there's no reason i should put myself in any awkward positions... which is what i feel i'd be doing.

    i know this comment is combative. it isn't necessarily my intent. anyone who truly knows me, KNOWS i am not combative. i just sometimes read you blog posts and i think to myself, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? ugh. and i find myself scratching my head and thanking the lord i'm living my own life and not yours. :(

    i wish i had a better words to say here, meredith. i just feel sometimes you like to dangle the carrot in your readers faces when you talk about all the "behind the blog" nonsense. the whole point about having blogs and making posts is ultimately to learn from one another, share our thoughts, and not be judge others. sometimes i feel like you do a lot of judging and sometimes your comments to others are harsh. this, of course, is just my own opinion.


    1. Since that was your opinion, Maryann, here is mine. If you don't like Meredith's posts, then stop reading her blog. If you don't want to invite her to read your blog then email her back and tell her so. If what she said to you in an email bothered you, then respond back to her by EMAIL. Posting all this CRAP! on a comment is ridiculous and extremely immature! You are very much trying to stir the pot - to cause problems and frankly, Blogland can use less problems, not more. Feel free to stay over in your own Blogland to stir the pot their. We don't need or want stirrers here.

    2. *there, not their.

  15. Hey Mere...happy everything is going well for you and Jack...I do like his 'lean in or lean over'. ;)

    Hugs and Blessings...

  16. great comment anonymous,,,Mere is a sweet lady and didn't deserve that comment from Maryanne


  17. by the way Maryanne,,I was always told that if you have a problem with someone you go to them ,and only to them,,you don't make a comment so everyone else can read it. Your the one that's gossiping,not Mere.

  18. I love Jack's saying!! It's...perfect. I like that you have realistic (situational) dd. Jack isn't so strict that he finds something to punish you for everyday. He sees a situation, he remedies it, and then moves on. But more often than not, you lean in. :)

    Maryanne, I have to agree with Anonymous and Leah. You shouldn't have stated that "opinion" here. An email would have been far better. Meredith does so much behind this blog. she is one of the most selfless people I "know" here. She truly is a huge help to a lot of ladies, not just in her blogging, but mostly through emails. I have never found her to be a gossip or one fishing for fodder for gossip.
    I'm sorry that you feel the way you do.

  19. Beautiful post, Meredith. I love how you illustrate Jack's faithfulness in keeping the peace. And peace is what we need in this world. Also, your own faithfulness in submitting to those spankings must make him very happy. This is the kind of gentle dd.that keeps you two so much in love. It certainly is beautiful!

  20. Love the post and our marriage tends to ebb and flow as well, depending on the "situations" in our daily lives. It made me feel more normal in our Dd relationship.

    As for the negative comment...we all have those in this world that we are closer to. It's natural and perfectly acceptable. Thank you Meredith for reaching out to me behind the scenes of the blog with emails that encourage me!! It has really helped me feel accepted. Hugs!!!

  21. I love your posts Meredith. Thanks for speaking about the "behind the blog". It is because you mentioned this that I realized that you would be open to emails.
    Thanks for continuing to share your life with us and extending a hand of friendship as well.

  22. Hi Meredith, :) "Lean in or lean over." Wonderful way to put it, and that's for sure! Glad that you two are so happy and have found your groove. Many hugs,

    <3 Katie

  23. Just sounds like dd/ttwd to me. *shrug*