We have rounded the bend on the road of ttwd/dd and stopped short. A huge bump in the road had my full attention. The bump in the road had Jack's complete attention too. Gulp!
I was on the phone with a friend I have known since we were small. She and I were gossiping like there was no tomorrow. Jack overheard our chatter and sat frowning at me as I went on and on with my friend. When I ended the call, he told me to my sitting spot. He began by telling me that gossip is unbecoming and makes the one doing it look small and petty. I countered with that is the way many women talk to one another. Placing his hand on my leg, he said, "Not my wife". I started to feel uneasy as he went on. He said he realized, while listening to me chat, that he had the means to stop that behavior in his wife and change is exactly what was going to happen.
If you have read my blog from the beginning, you know we do not do rules or punishments. The word punishment is never used, ever. With me sitting right in front of him, he continued talking. Gossip he said makes you less than what you are. Gossip cheapens you. Gossip can hurt you when the people you are talking to gossip about you. He then said that all gossip would stop immediately and if I choose to do it anyway, I would be spanked. Did I understand? Gossip would not be tolerated.
I laughed telling him it was the way I talked with this long time friend. I said it is our way. He said that that way ends right now. I asked if he would really spank for this. He said indeed he would and it would be best to not test the rule as the consequence would be painful. Wait, a rule???? We don't do rules here. He said that we do now. The gossip rule is in place and he is requiring his wife to be impeccable in her speaking. He ended our talk by saying he is fully aware of having the authority to stop me from gossiping.
This is a long Fourth of July week-end. We are with others at several events and I feel like I am walking on eggshells as this holiday week end gets started. I know in my heart that Jack is right. I want to please him and I do not want a serious spanking.
So I found this gossip advice online and thought Jack is amazing. Jack hardly needs SEVEN ways to curb gossiping. He has just ONE way to halt any future gossip tendencies. He has now defined gossiping a spankable offense. In our journey in ttwd/dd, we have arrived at a situation like no other. He has told me what will happen. I know the consequence and must follow his "rule" or receive the discipline.
Stay tuned. I am a work in process. Once we finished our talk on the couch, I raced to my ttwd/dd friends asking for their support and help. I could do this. I would do this. I wanted to please my husband. I know that not gossiping is the right thing to do. I know that gossiping hurts others and is unbecoming. Keep your fingers crossed. Say a little prayer.
Jack only needs ONE way to stop the gossip. He is my HOH after all these years.