Tuesday, February 4, 2014
We have been practicing ttwd/dd for almost nine months and this morning, victory was mine. It has been a long time coming. I am happy and Jack is very happy.
Jack was annoyed with me on many fronts. I was busy and determined to do my own thing. We were headed out to lunch with good friends. Finally he cornered me in the master bath as I finished my make-up. He said he wanted my full attention. I stopped and turned to look at him. Then the firm, stern, quiet lecture began. I stood quietly soaking it all up realizing I deserved this talking-to. When he had finished, I was quiet and nodded. I said I was sorry and truly meant it. I was submissive and contrite.
Nine months ago things would have been very different. If Jack had talked to me using that stern tone, I would have flipped out and a huge argument would have occurred. Sparks would fly and the one of those awful silence periods would follow. How long would the silence and arguing last......... trust me, I could keep an argument alive and well for a very long time.
Back from our lunch, I told Jack I wanted to talk. I sat on the ottoman in front of his chair. I told him again how sorry I was for my poor attitude. He told me that as he talked to me in the bathroom earlier that morning, he had watched my face. He said that if there had been any sign of defiance, he would have given me the hardest spanking ever. Instead what he saw was his wife's submission and acceptance of his firm words. He saw that I was contrite, respectful and apologetic. There would be no spanking.
Do you know how hard I have worked to get to this point? I know that today I accepted what Jack said. I feel very good, but realistic that things may not always go so well. I just simlpy melt in his arms after times like this. I feel like I am falling in love with my husband all over again. I have this golden moment to tuck away. I will remember submission, Meredith-style.