Monday, December 30, 2013

Leaning Into Jack

I feel like whispering because if I say it out loud, the smoothness becomes real bumpy. Jack is taking care of things. For the most part, I am accepting his guidance and decisions. The shakedown time is over. Things are different here. What has changed is me.

Flipping out creates a sideshow here. I have done that twice in the last few weeks. Jack took care of things. He spanked and then spanked again. Because I know what will happen, I find myself checking what I say and what I do. I remember that calm and serene are best and usually act accordingly.

We do a lot of talking. In fact we do way more talking than spanking. Communication is especially essential.  The two places we do the most talking are in the car and under the covers. Jack talks the language of ttwd/dd like no one else. He tells me what would happen to my backside if .................
This talk that he does really turns me on and results in my listening and following what he says to do.
The best line Jack gives me is "You choose....... you can lean into what I say or what I want you to do or you can lean over the bed".  He says. "You have the bottom and I have the paddle".

This talk so settles me and focuses my behavior, talking and thinking. So we continue to do role affirmation spankings, good girl spankings and lots of spanks during the day as we go about things. I won't say things are smooth because saying that causes things to go crazy here. We are just living a ttwd/gentle dd life. It works for us.

Jack is a gentle HoH who is strong and determined to keep the peace in our home. There is strength in his gentleness and he is always so good to me. He knows what I need and he gives me what I need.

Something else has happened in a sweet, gentle way too. We have been married a long time. Yet at this time, we feel more intimacy than at any other time in our marriage. It is like we are falling in love all over again only this time we are wiser and older.  At a time when other marriages  crumble or husbands and wives lead separate lives, Jack and I are very much in love and are very sensual and responsive to one another. He wants me in lovely lingerie and compliments me concerning my body. He does see my backside sometimes a little too much, but he really likes my new submissive nature. He says he likes when I step back and accept his way. He says it surprises him when I accept this new way.  I don't argue. I remain calm. I am leaning into what he wants.  I am still whispering these words because when I say them out loud, the smoothness can evaporate.

Does that happen to you too?


Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays

Jack and I wish you and yours the happiest of holidays. The apple pie is in the oven and all is right in Meredith's world. Jack is happy and the winter sun is shining. Enjoy your friends and family. Jack and I are doing just that.

Meredith and Jack

Sunday, December 22, 2013

A Sexy Skirt And An Attentive Husband

Even with Christmas approaching we tangle with messy family stuff. I was feeling really down because I can't fix it. All I can do is invite my family to Christmas Eve dinner and hope that there is love and peace around the table. It is not my problem to fix. I have been spanked for arguing with Jack about this family situation and Jack asked if I needed another spanking to stop the fretting, worrying and arguing. I quickly said no and spent some time really feeling down with the joy of the  season upon us.

Jack found me, held me with his hand on my bottom. He told me he wanted me in my new, sexy, short black skirt and my smart little jacket. We were going out. I said that I did not really feel like it and with that, he swatted me right there in the kitchen. He said we were going for a little Christmas shopping and we would enjoy wine in a little bistro afterwards. I could go willingly or I could go with a really sore bottom. He would allow no pouting and I was to have a smile on my face and a swing to my new skirt! I choose the swing in my skirt option.

We went to a little town where the busyness of the holiday had been forgotten. Little shops were open and shopkeepers were friendly. We parked the car as dusk settled and all the little bright lights shone.  We bought just a few things and headed for the bistro. Jack continually touched me........ holding hands, placing his hand on my backside. We walked the village streets in love like we were kids.

We enjoyed our wine and he complimented me on bouncing back and for responding positively to his talk. We talked about some future travel plans and teased about gifts under the tree. I leaned into his heart and mood and he caught me with his love and strength. Never have I loved him more.


Thursday, December 19, 2013

Spanked An Hour After Posting About Mellow Meredith

One hour after posting about Mellow Meredith, I was spanked! Good grief! Jack and I went from mellow to OTB in just over an hour. I had tooted that life was smooth and easy with no bumps, no arguments, no bickering. I had shared that Jack had it too easy. And just like that, an argument flared. Jack and I had words. I shouted and cried and the spanking hadn't even started. Jack had one hand on his hip and his other hand pointing a finger at me and the bed. I quickly asked forgiveness and he said all would be forgiven after the spanking. So just like that, I went from submissive good wife to submissive paddled wife in a little over a hour's time. 

When I had posted about Mellow Meredith, I was really feeling smug and assured that we had this ttwd/dd down and what quick learners we both were. Six months to smoothness! HA! I was really shook up after the spanking not believing how I could go from mellow to paddled so fast. I cried during the argument and knew in my heart where this was all going. Jack is never hesitant. He quickly took care of my bottom and now we start over again. 

There will be no more posts about mellow and smooth.


Mellow Meredith

Things are so easy right now. Ttwd/dd has had an amazing effect on our marriage. Jack and I are so gentle and sweet with one another. It seems almost eerie and unnatural. Where is my fight, my grouchiness, my sass, my backtalk?  It has significantly diminished. I tell Jack that he has it too easy. Sure, we kid and tease  talking about ttwd/dd, but there has been no HoH looks and no big spankings in quite some time. We have had fun spankings and have recently purchased another implement. Smooth and mellow here!

Jack has complimented me many times on my leaning into his direction and wishes. He has said he is amazed at the change in me! I am calm and so is our home. My contrariness is gone and we both feel it.

I am expecting the familiar setbacks, but none have happened so far. No arguments, no long silences, no bickering! I feel such a big change inside. Jack talks about spanking me and I just melt into those words. The fight in me has vanished. My temper is no more. Friends have commented on this change and ask why. I could tell them that my flaring temper has been paddled right out of me, but that hasn't  been necessary in quite awhile.

We are doing role affirmation spankings.......... preventative spankings if you will. They are working me right into being mellow. As Jack says, what's not to love.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

More photos That Speak To Me Part Three

This is the third bunch of photos that make me think about how much ttwd/dd influences our lives.
Consent and surrender, trust and love,  hamonry and peace at home .......... as we approach the days before Christmas, I give thanks to a husband who is loving, gentle and kind. He gives me what I both need and want. Thank you, Jack. Thank you, readers. 


Special thanks for the research, L.


Friday, December 6, 2013

Surrender Spanking and Things I Want To Know

To submit to Jack for a spanking is humbling and powerful. When it is time, he tells me to be still. And that is just what I do. I quiet and get ready to submit. To me, it is the most powerful of our ttwd/dd moments. When he decides to spank, there are no negotiations or arguing. I am to be quiet and get ready. I find it amazing because that is just what I do. I become still and Jack gets me ready. I am really amazed by my behavior as I do what Jack tells me to of.  I work hard at become submissive to Jack everyday. I stumble and try again. However when he takes me to the bedroom, I mind him. I am still and quiet.

My questions are for you, the reader.

When it is time to go over your husband's knee, do you become quiet and submissive?

Are you still arguing and still fighting his decision with the spanking about to start?

At what point, do you accept what will happen?

Please tell me.


Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Double Standard At My House

I hate to buy gas. Plenty of bloggers are right there with me. I dislike stopping in the middle of my errands to put gas in the car. Annoying and time consuming, indeed. Several bloggers have commented on ignoring the gas gauge as the needle dips to the danger zone. A couple of bloggers have run out of gas completely. As a young bride in a brand new beetle bug, I did run out of gas and thought never again.  Now I have a really fun sports car and its gas gauge beeps when the tank reaches that point that requires a trip to the gas station. I usually ignore the beep, drive home and tell Jack that my car needs gas. I know................ that sounds indulged, spoiled and whatever. 

Sometimes Jack forgets my reminder. So I find myself at the gas pump when I am needing to be on the road, the freeway or on to the mall. The last time this happened,  I filled my gas tank halfway and went merrily on my way. And there is the problem. Halfway does not make Jack happy! I filled it halfway because I was running late. Pumping gas takes time. Right? Jack was very upset with me. He told me if I ever just did that job halfway, I would be spanked. Really? I still do not know what the big deal was. But wait, there is more. 

Now flash forward to just before Thanksgiving travel. I was with Jack when we stopped for gas in his car. He informed me that he was filling the tank halfway as the car would be at the car park for the next ten days while we traveled for Thanksgiving. Halfway, I replied. Really! So you can fill the gas tank halfway, but I must fill the tank completely in my car or get spanked. Why is that?

So right there at the gas station, Jack became all HoHy.  He seldom is that way verbally. He gathered me in his arms and said he would do it his way and I would do it his way. If more directions and reasons were needed, we would be doing both the explaining and the directions up in our bedroom with the paddle. He said again that there was his way and only his way concerning this subject. 

The ride home was very quiet and I uttered one too many sighs and sideways glances. Once home, he spanked me in the garage, me, bare bottomed and he, using his hand. Did he make himself understood? Yes, I said as I got things back in order covering my backside.

But not really!  I still do not understand the double standard here. When I told Jack what this post was about, he puffed his chest and for just a minute, I thought I would be put over his knee. 

What gives with the gas tank half full or to the brim? Actually I am a little weary about bringing it up again as Jack becomes visually HoHy when I do.  Someone needs to help me here. Double standard and a garage spanking!! Help me understand!


Sunday, December 1, 2013

Sweet Surrender

This long Thanksgiving time finds us with family far from home. The visiting was great and all we did was fun. Living in a hotel for a week was not at all fun. We really could not be ourselves. Returning to the hotel late at night and getting up early to join family for another day's adventure was fun, but this schedule left little time for us.

Jack complimented me on how I was handling things. He said he was pleased with my leaning into his decisions. Smooth and sweet until.............. on our almost last morning here, I barked orders and was snippy. Jack was quick to spank, hard and fast despite paper-thin hotel walls. Once again, I was totally surprised by this spanking. I had not realized how bossy I was. Jack was right there "to take care of things".  After the short spanking, I melted into his arms and apologized.  He said that the bossiness needs to go and he will spank it away whether we are home or away.

So now over six months in to ttwd/dd. and another time away from home, I am doing better at knowing what my husband expects of me and am aware that if needed, reminders will come my way. I find it very reassuring and safe to know that this sweet surrender is so right for me to accept.  I love the way it makes me feel. I feel loved and care for in so many ways.

We are home the day after tomorrow. When we are home and privacy is ours, I know we will have that delicious time to ourseleves and do the reaffirmation Jack and I both think is really important.