Wednesday, October 30, 2013

When Meredith Distances Herself And Finds Herself In A Stew

The day got off to  a rocky start. Jack was unhappy with me. He told me he wanted to talk about the way things were going. I said that I wasn't ready to talk. He told me that he would give me time, but there were things we needed to talk about. I shrugged and knew instantly just where I was standing...... very close the edge!

We went about our day separately. I thought about the rocky start and things that both were said and not said. He called me twice while I was out doing errands. I ignored both calls and then listened to his voice mail. The second voice mail sounded more irritated than the first. When I returned home, he wasn't there. You could actually feel the stew brewing here and the fire being stoked!  He called again. I answered and talked in short clipped sentences. Not good! I am not sure why I was distancing myself from the way we do things. I just did not want to talk and I did want to stay mad ......... for a while! I knew we would talk, but I was not ready to do so.

We were headed out to our friends' home for dinner. I was all dressed up waiting for Jack. Jack came into the kitchen and in once swoop, he gathered me in his arms and tilted my chin so our eyes met. He said, "Either your attitude changes immediately, or we are going upstairs for the biggest belt spanking you have ever had". I simply melted into his arms and the brewing stew mess was over. I was a submissive wife and we were off to the dinner party.

In a dd/ttwd home like ours, distancing is always addressed..... always. The next morning Jack brought me coffee and told me after the cup was empty, I would be paddled. Role affirmation is the consequence for distancing. I knew better than to argue. That would only make matters worse. The spanking was done in our guest room. The bed is lower and Jack likes me close. I always have a hard time with that paddle and holding still was impossible making the spanking last a long time. Jack said after it was over that talking is not something to put off. Did I understand? With the paddle firmly against my backside, agreement came quickly. No more distancing for Meredith!


  1. Well I don't know how I missed this post but I'm glad I found it today! I hope the party was nice at least!


  2. I've done that too, been mad and wanted to stay mad. But I don't know why. It's like I'm fighting the "good" instead of working towards it. Frustrating!!
    Glad it over. Hope you're both in better spots. :)

  3. This is a great post! In my experience, pre-ttwd when I was hurt or angry I would distance myself from my husband, not knowing why, just knowing that I wanted to. There was such a sense of "will things ever go back to good?" and desperation on my part too. Now I understand that I was doing it to provoke him into coming to me to help me work it out and there is a certainty that I can feel even as I begin the downward spiral that it's all eventually going to be ok because he won't let me fall too far.